Single and Looking: Daisy
Secret Lives of Sisters
by Belinda Austin
Genre: Chick Lit
At First, Daisy Ignores Her Cat's Dating Advice.
Daisy will turn 40 in
eleven months and has never married. Her family figures Daisy is a loser
because she is still in college trying to avoid paying off her student loans
which have amassed over 22 years of a miseducation. And all Daisy has is a cat
to keep her company. To make the crises worse, her cat begins talking to Daisy,
when she is sober! The mess of Daisy's life is even kookier because the cat is
cursing and smoking now and drinking more alcoholic beverages. Mm, there must
be a connection to all this flowing alcohol, which may explain the bubbly in
Daisy's brain. Her sisters and mother insist on setting Daisy up on six blind
dates and all the men are named after liquor.
A heartwarming, LOL
book that will make you smile.
Excerpt
Why would she listen to dating tips from a fixed kitty? In
other words, Shakespeare was a virgin. The status of his privates was probably
the reason the cat was an overweight, alcoholic, chain-smoker. “I don’t want to
seem thirsty,” she said.
He raised a kitty eyebrow.
“In dating lingo thirsty means that I am desperate for a
boyfriend or you know, thirsty for…”
“For a one-night lay.”
“Well that but more like for a meaningful relationship. And
then there’s an online profile with a picture which needs to be posted on
dating websites, and you know that I am not photogenic.”
“Your butt photographs very well,” the cat said. “Display
that ass on the internet and your email account will explode with offers from
all kinds of blokes.”
“Nor do I care to brag about myself,” she said.
“Well, if you don’t brag then who will?”
“Nor do I want to attract men who are only interested in one
thing.”
“The lady doth protest too much, methinks.” The cat plopped
in front of the refrigerator, his big rump sticking up, blocking the door and
waiting for lunch. He was stoned and drunk, having licked a bit of wine and
sniffed catnip.
Daisy felt silly holding a newspaper over his head to
smack the demon out of him. Shakespeare was sucking his paw, as usual when
relaxing. He was the same old smelly cat, except for his mastering the English
language and spouting forth lines from his namesake, William Shakespeare.
About The Author
Belinda
Austin writes Women's Fiction, Romanic Comedy, Humor, Psychological Thrillers
and Suspense. She has a degree in Applied Mathematics and once worked as a
Software Engineer. She was born in the Los Angeles Area and is an award-winning
author. She is a Zumbaholic.
Belinda,
also, writes Science Fiction and Fantasy under the name of B. Austin. She
writes Historical Fiction under the name of Belinda Vasquez Garcia, along with
Middle Grade Fiction.
She has occasionally dreamt or her cat, Shakespeare, talking to her in
English. She once had a cat named Whiskey who used to sit like a human in a
chair for half an hour or more with an empty beer can on his head, which proves
that life often emulates fiction.
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